


you're under my skin

by juanpercen



Series: i get to love you [3]
Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: M/M, just best friends stupidly in love, the woes and hows of kai's oblivious ass
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-13 21:09:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28784724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/juanpercen/pseuds/juanpercen
Summary: Kai has no idea how confessions work but he's certain, this is not it.He should be telling Beomgyu how much he's so terribly in love with him, not this.Not like this."You're in love with me," he says.The silence between them is black. The rug under their toes is white. Beomgyu is beeting red when Kai breathes out."You're actually, really in love with me."Oh, dear god.(a confession - or not so much)
Relationships: Choi Beomgyu/Huening Kai
Series: i get to love you [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1814206
Comments: 10
Kudos: 88





	you're under my skin

**Author's Note:**

> this has no connection to the first two of the series. merely a third installment, a standalone oneshot.

When Huening Kai realizes that he's in love with Beomgyu, their neighbor who always somehow crashes in their apartment, his senior by one year, the literal hearttrob of their university, his self-proclaimed walking, breathing megaphone - it didn't come as a surprise.

When Kai realizes he's actually in love with him, it's like this -

_"Holy shit," he spits out the popcorn he's munching as he stares blankly at Edward and Bella sucking faces in the television._

_"Yeah, holy shit," Hoseok, his older cousin, smirks beside him - clearly enjoying what he's watching._

_Kai inhales, looking down wide-eyed at his phone laying inches away from the bowl of kettle corns - where messages from Beomgyu were displayed that read ;_

> _u_ _r watching_ _twilight? cool._
> 
> _but did u know vampires can run so fast they don't leave footprints in snow just like LotR elves and that is physics nonsense_

_He takes a deep breath._

_"No, really." Kai blinks. "Holy shit."_

_Hoseok turns to him and squints his eyes. "Yah!" He smacks the younger on the back of his head._

_"Who told you you could cuss like that twice?!"_

_Kai groans and gives his cousin a stinkeye before directing his gaze back to Bella and Edward in the screen._

_"Are they in love?"_

_"What does it look like to you?" Hoseok slurps the noodle loudly, wiping his lips after. "Do you think they're just best friends who casually kiss each other from time to time?"_

_Kai blushes and he cups his nape as he mumbles, "Can't best friends do that..."_

_Hoseok slams the cup he's holding loudly on the table before looking at Kai with narrowed eyes. "Do you see me kissing Jimin - "_

_Kai cuts him off. "No."_

_"See. It's because - "_

_"I know you badly want to though," continues Kai._

_Hoseok freezes, jaw slacked and hanged._

_Kai scratches his cheek. "Don't you?"_

_He blinks and slowly puts the chopsticks down as he exhales. "Is it too obvious?"_

_"Yes." Kai answers quickly. "But don't worry. Jimin hyung is a little too dumb to notice your hopeless pinning anyway."_

_"Wow. You're unbelievable," muses Hoseok._

_"Thanks, I hear that a lot." He shrugs._

_Silence ensues between them for a while before Kai breaks it with a confession of;_

_"I want to kiss Beomgyu."_

_Hoseok snorts. "Are you going through puberty? Kids like you are s - "_

_"No. Not that, hyung."_

_"What?"_

_"I want to kiss him. Like - really kiss him."_

_Hoseok nods uncertainly, "Okay?"_

_Kai slowly inhales. "I want to hold his hand too."_

_He continues as he mindlessly taps on the screen of his phone. "I have this urge to hug him when I see him. All the time. I like it when he borrows my clothes. I - I don't know hyung. " Kai swallows. "I just want him close to me all the time."_

_Hoseok blinks at him. "Holy shit."_

_Kai bites his lips and chuckles shyly. "Yeah. Holy shit."_

Okay. So yes, he is in love with Choi Beomgyu.

"I'm going to do it."

"No, you're not going to do anything."

"I said," Kai heaves a breath in. "I'm going to do it."

"He's definitely going to do it."

Yeonjun glares at his boyfriend, Soobin, from his position, laying on the couch with his head turned to them upside down. "Babe, you're not helping."

He sits up and sighs. "It's too early to confess. Aren't you even scared of getting rejected?"

Kai puts down the drumsticks he's twirling between his fingers. "Why would I be? It's Beomgyu hyung."

"Wow. Your bravery is quite amusing," Soobin laughs loudly. "Babe, look at him! Kai actually had more balls to confess than you! You were such a coward back then."

Yeonjun glares at him. "You know what? I'm done with this conversation."

"Just help me." Kai intervenes before the couple gets into a more heated debate of who confessed first between them.

Soobin looks at him with a brow raised. "Do it your own way."

"Yes, I will, thank you very much." Kai grimaces. "I just need suggestions."

Yeonjun raises a hand and grins.

"Okay! I have an idea. What about - "

-

_Suggestion #1: Ask him out privately._

To have Beomgyu all by himself was proven to be quite a difficult task, given that the older has lots of friends (Kai personally thinks that he knows each and every student in their university, from the Dean to his family down to the janitor's daughter) and that Beomgyu had a lot of after school commitments.

Surprisingly, when Kai asked Beomgyu if he could talk to him privately, Beomgyu immediately relented. Even going as far as this; _"What do you mean by privately? Like - the two of us alone? Or you're pertraining to a situation in which someone's thoughts and feelings are not disclosed to others? Which - "_

_"Just," Kai stops him and smiles at him bashfully. "Just being alone with you is fine, hyung."_

_"Alone," Beomgyu blinks. "The two of us. Haha." He laughs and his hand skims up to touch his burning red ears._

Kai brings him to his and Hoseok's apartment (Hoseok smirked at him on his way out when he saw them). Reasoning out that he needs help on his assignment in film studies.

When he's already standing in front of Beomgyu already though, alone and preferably composed ( _he's no_ t) - he couldn't bring himself to voice the words out.

"I ... "

Beomgyu hums and looks at him expectedly.

_I like you. I adore you. I keep wanting to see your smile._

"I.." He gulps and looks down to Beomgyu's hands.

"I received the bracelet you bought for me yesterday." Kai looks away and clears his throat.

"Oh." He hears Beomgyu mutters.

Kai throws his eyes back on the older when he grabs Kai's wrist to touch his gift.

"When I saw this bracelet, I knew immediately it'd suit you."

Kai holds his breath when Beomgyu positively beams, his dimple out as his smile grows on his lips.

He swallows. "Thanks."

Beomgyu only smiles more and takes Kai's hand up to press his palm against his, comparing sizes.

"Your hand is huge," he says.

"Yeah," Kai bites his lips and looks away again.

Something warm blooms in his heart when Beomgyu didn't let go of his hand.

-

_( "Okay," Yeonjun grips his shoulder. "How did it go?"_

_"I didn't confess."_

_"Why?"_

_"Didn't feel like the right time."_

_Soobin speaks beside Yeonjun. "Nah, you're just a loser."_

_Kai groans. )_

_-_

_Suggestion #2: Confess subtly._

"Hyung," Kai calls Beomgyu gently.

Beomgyu turns to him, still laughing at something Yeonjun said. He tugs Kai's sleeves and Kai is pretty sure he felt his heartstrings getting tugged too.

"I really like this song." He tried to hide the way his hands slightly trembled and casually puts the other bud of the earphones to Beomgyu's ear.

"Okay," Beomgyu puts it properly and completely ignores Yeonjun when the eldest stole his last blueberry lollipop. "What song?"

Kai gulps and bows his head, shrugging as if he didn't just spend at least six hours in tumblr and blogs, an embarrassing _how i confessed to crush with day6 songs_ sitting precariously in his recent searches.

"It's a Day6 song. You like them, right?"

Beomgyu's face lights up. "Man! I knew you'd come around. I looooove all their songs, " he gushes.

Kai chuckles and brings a hand up to ruffle Beomgyu's hair.

He pauses when the older just continues to stare at him, a tense breath between them that lasted seconds before Kai clears his throat.

He turns and fishes his phone out of his blazer's pocket to play the song.

_In life, there aren't many days_   
_When things go your way_   
_There are more days when it didn't go my way_   
_Will today be another one of those days?_   
_I am pretty worried_

Beomgyu looks at him when he recognizes the song. "Oh."

Kai just shrugs.

_After I tell you these words_   
_I'm not sure if we can go back_   
_To smiling like we are now_   
_But I have to_   
_I.._

Kai leans back on his seat, careful to not accidentally pull the other end of his earphones from Beomgyu. He hangs his head back as he closes his eyes and sings along.

_Like you_   
_I tried holding it back_   
_But I can't anymore_   
_Now I can tell you_   
_I want to love_   
_You_

He feels Beomgyu's stare at him, boring the side of his face.

"I like you."

Kai holds his breath and turns to look at Beomgyu.

The older blinks at him, flushing red. "That's - that's the title of the song. I like you..."

"Ah," Kai mumbles.

"By Day6. I like you by Day6," Beomgyu huffs a laugh, scratching his nape as Kai continues to look at him.

"Beomgyu hyung, I.. I - "

"Did you know someone confessed to me through that song?" Beomgyu cuts him off. He gestures with his hands and laughs the tense silence off between them.

"Someone did?" Kai furrows his brows.

_Tsk._

"Yeah. It was very flattering. I remember her whenever I listen to this song. Kinda just brings back the impression."

Kai bites his lips and nods. He looks at his watch and starts to move. "Ah, hyung, I think I have to go now. Hoseok hyung - "

"No, wait!"

Kai looks back at Beomgyu and sees him asking for his phone.

"Let's listen to one more song. Come on."

Kai is slightly abashed for being a little too weak when exposed to Beomgyu's puppy eyes because he can't say no to him when he's looking at him like that. Kai is actually weak to everything Beomgyu does but this look especially makes his stomach churn.

Ah. Butterflies in the stomach.

Touché.

"Okay."

He settles beside the older again and he slightly tenses up when Beomgyu rests his head to his shoulder and plays another Day6 song.

_You're so pretty when you smile_   
_So every time you lose that smile_   
_Even if I have to give my all_   
_I want to give it back to you_

Kai moves his shoulder, making Beomgyu's head bounce. He laughs when the older shoots him a glare and only annoys him further by ruffling his hair aggressively.

_When you love someone_   
_So much that it overflows_   
_It's so amazing_   
_Because this is how it is_

Beomgyu punches him on the arm, once - then twice. Kai laughs and catches his little fists, squeezing them between his own that Beomgyu tries to break free from. When he succeeded, he pinches Kai on the side and laughs when the younger grimaces.

_This is a song for you_   
_I'm singing for you_   
_I'll give you my everything_

The earphones between them fell on the ground as they continue their wrestle, the music unheard as both of them burst into raucous laughter.

Kai pretends to flinch when Beomgyu punches him again, peeking to see his reaction and laughing when he sees him furrowing his brows.

He pauses to appreciate Beomgyu's smile when the other isn't looking.

Kai looks down at his phone and sees the song still playing.

_Day6 - When you love someone_

-

_( "You look too happy, it's disgusting." Hoseok complains._

_Kai glares at him. "Tell that to me when you finally make a move on Jimin."_

_"Rude. Yah, I'm older than you - " Hoseok huffs._

_"Okay. Tell that to me when you finally have the balls to make a move on Jimin, hyung."_

_"I really feel like I shouldn't be disrespected like this, Hueningie."_

_"You're not my dad."_

_"Except I am, kid!" )_

_-_

_Suggestion #3:_ _Confess through letters._

This idea is dumb.

The one who proposed it is kinda dumb too. (Clue: His name is Yeonjun.)

Kai is almost a hundred percent certain this won't work. One, because he's not good with words. It's annoying when he can't put his feelings into words, much more his feelings for Beomgyu. Two, Beomgyu will recognize his handwriting anyways.

He tells that to Yeonjun.

_"Man, suck it up! That's the point. You don't really have to hide your identity. You're confessing, remember?"_

Okay, maybe he's a little, tiny bit right.

He doesn't really have to do this anonymously.

That didn't necessarily make this any easier for him though.

On Friday evening when he forced Beomgyu to hang out with his friends other than him, he bought a simple card and a colored pen.

He spent the entire night writing and rephrasing _i like you_ in every way he could think. By 12 midnight, he put the pen down and sighed heavily.

Kai flopped himself on his bed, groaning.

In the morning, his headache roots from the problem of when and how should he slip the letter to Beomgyu.

"You're distracted," Beomgyu observes when the older asked Kai to accompany him in the Library.

Kai looks at him, wide-eyed, and shrugs. "Just - needed sleep, is all."

Beomgyu narrows his eyes at him and flicks his forehead. "I told you to sleep early last night, dumbass!"

Kai moans and rubs his forehead, pouting and leaning his head on Beomgyu's shoulder. "I had things to do, hyung!" He whines.

Beomgyu just rolls his eyes. Kai is a 183 cm giant and he's already used to him whining like a puppy.

"Stop pouting."

Kai just laughs and doesn't move from his position. He didn't see the fond smile on Beomgyu's face.

Before they parted, Kai was able to slip his letter in Beomgyu's Calc book.

_I like you. I don't know how else to say it. I just do._

-

_( "You ever think of the possibility of Beomgyu liking you back?" Taehyun asks him on their way to the radio station where they work part-time as DJs._

_"That's farfetched."_

_Taehyun rolls his eyes because his friend is an oblivious prick._

_"No. Come to think of it, Hyuka. I think he likes you too."_

_Kai rubs his nape and shakes his head. "Don't put that idea in my head, Tyun. I don't really want... to hope."_

_"Then why are you even confessing?"_

_"To let him know." Kai says simply and shrugs._

_He puts his hands in his jean's pocket as he stares up at the sky._

_"I just want him to know."_

_Taehyun nods and smiles, looking away._

_"I think he does." He whispers to no one in particular. )_

_-_

Kai expected Beomgyu to act differently around him (whether in a good or bad way) after he read his confession, only to find out the next day that Beomgyu lost his Calc book.

"I lost it, what the fuck. Why am I so forgetful." Beomgyu groans.

Kai just blinks at him and Taehyun, who was sitting beside them that lunch, gave Kai a snicker.

"That sucks." He says.

Kai couldn't agree more.

-

Suggestion #4: _Introduce the idea without saying anything._

To be clear, this one is Kai's idea.

He decides to just - _whatever,_ and tell Beomgyu without actually telling him the three words _( "That wouldn't make much difference. I say, you just blurt out the three words to him." "You don't understand, Soobin hyung. It's not that easy." "I know but you can do it. Your parents did not raise a quitter." Yeah, they raised a coward )_ because apparently, Kai is doing a very poor job in flirting.

"What are you even thinking about?" Beomgyu asks him suddenly, counting the number of times Kai sighed that day.

They are out in the park, ten o'clock in the evening. They are both sitting on a swing respectively. Beomgyu is swaying slightly while observing Kai's face.

The younger looks back at him.

_You._

"Just school stuffs."

Beomgyu arches a brow but accepts his answer as he turns away and looks at the sky instead.

"The moon is beautiful, isn't it?" Kai speaks, eyes set on Beomgyu's side profile.

He traces his eyes on him and holds his breath as a smile grows on Beomgyu's lips.

Kai feels his heart stutter, staring at Beomgyu's smile. _Damn, that special smile._

The older looks at him, eyes twinkling, face free of exhaustion oftentimes plastered visibly on it, lips pulled in a grin that takes Kai's breath away.

_Does he know?_

"It is," Beomgyu answers easily. Laughing a little bit, "It really is."

_"The moon is beautiful, isn't it?" - a more poetic way of saying I love you._

-

_( "I'm pretty sure Beomgyu knows what it meant." Yeonjun muses._

_"No, he doesn't. He just agreed because he thought I meant it literally." Kai sighs and covers his face._

_"No, no. Beomgyu has an elective class and it's Japanese. He knows what it means." Yeonjun rebuts. "He just accepted your confession!"_

_Kai once again groans._

_"He's in love with you too, I'm telling you." Soobin supplies helpfully, patting his head. )_

_-_

Once every month, Kai tends to break down.

It's nothing groundbreaking. Just him crumbling with all the piling tension and pressure from university.

He tends to disappear.

That's when he shuts people away. He turns his phone off the whole day, locks himself in his dark, silent room for hours. He doesn't talk to anyone and doesn't bother eating meals.

Usually, it only lasts for a day.

Just a day break that he allows himself.

He uses that day to reboot.

By now, his friends - even his Hoseok hyung is already used to it and they give him their silent support by spamming his inbox with comforting messages even though they know he won't check them, or by sending him foods in an attempt of making him eat.

Beomgyu is the only one who pushes his way in.

He'd knock on Kai's door nonstop, refusing to go away when Kai doesn't let him in. He'd stay by the door, slipping notes to him and sometimes, just talking to himself (basically a monologue) or talk about his day as if Kai is listening (he does - and maybe, Beomgyu knows that).

He's always a reckon.

Kai is actually silently grateful for the presence because Beomgyu grounds him.

He's crying but at least he knows his favorite person is there, sitting opposite the door and just patiently waiting for Kai to let him in.

Kai never understands why he does that though. Beomgyu could just go on his day, do what others do when Kai is like this. He could just _not_ care.

But Beomgyu _do_ care. Unyieldingly.

"Why are you even still here?" Kai mumbles, face buried on his knees in an attempt to make himself smaller.

His voice is quiet but he knows Beomgyu heard him from the other side of the door. There's a muffled sound.. then Beomgyu's voice when he answered.

"I'd rather be here than anywhere else." His tone is light, his answer simple - like he doesn't even have to think before he answer.

Kai swallows.

"Why?" He still asks because it's not clear to him.

"Because I care, Huening-ah." Beomgyu shrugs.

"Why do you care?"

There's a passing second when Beomgyu answered silence.

Kai leans his head back to the door and closes his eyes.

Right at that moment, he had the strong urge to tell Beomgyu his feelings. How much power the older has on him, how much he admires him, how much he wants him close all the time.

But Beomgyu is speaking again before Kai could open his mouth to confess.

"Because you're special to me. Always has been."

His answer is straight forward and it made Kai think back of all the times Beomgyu waited for him until late evening even though they don't have the same schedule just so they'll go home together, he remembers Beomgyu choosing him over everyone else tripping for his presence, he suddenly remembers all the late night guitar session when Kai would call him because he can't sleep despite the ungodly hour.

He remembers Beomgyu barging in his life ungracefully but somehow he just fit in like he has always been a part of Kai's routine.

Kai remembers Beomgyu looking at him a second longer, holding him just a little tighter, smiling at him just a little brighter.

_Because you're special._

Kai inhales and he wants to confess. He wants Beomgyu to know how much he loves seeing the unguarded happiness in his eyes, how much he loves being the reason behind his smiles, how much he wants to be the only -

"Special," Kai mutters.

How much he wants to be the only person Beomgyu will treat specially.

Kai stands up and opens the door. Beomgyu staggers and lands on his back because he was leaning his back on the door when it opened.

The older gulps, standing up quickly and facing Kai, even though he had to tilt his head up a little bit. His eyes are worried as he hurrily scans Kai's face.

"Hyung, I..."

He paused when he sees Beomgyu's eyes lingering on his lips.

He's going to confess. He's really going to confess but -

Kai has no idea how confessions work but he's certain, this is not it.

He should be telling Beomgyu how much he's so terribly in love with him, not this.

Not like this.

"You're in love with me," he says.

The silence between them is black. The rug under their toes is white. Beomgyu is beeting red when Kai breathes out.

"You're actually, really in love with me."

When the realization hits, Kai stumbles a few steps back. He doesn't even realize he's speaking the words before he could think of what Beomgyu will say.

He doesn't have to wonder for long though because Beomgyu is already rambling before Kai could take the words back.

"Fuck. I didn't plan to let you know this way, I swear. I want to confess to you properly and maybe, take you out on a real fucking date where we could do couple things. I've been really wanting to be more than just your best friend. I am in love with you and I think everyone knows that but you - which is kinda miserable but now you do and this isn't how I planned to confess at all. I - "

Kai effectively cuts him off from his rambling by kissing him on the lips - just a mere touch, really. But both of them froze, eyes comically wide and dangerously close to not breathing.

Kai pulls away and clears his throat, blinking several times as he gestures. "I - uhh. Uhm. I like you too."

Beomgyu didn't answer and he's still looking at Kai, wide-eyed.

"A lot," Kai continues slowly. He peeks at Beomgyu's face under his lashes as he dips his head, his ears burning red. "I like you a lot, hyung."

Beomgyu seems to take an extra gulp of air before his posture relaxes. He bites his lips to contain his smile as he positively bounces on his heels when he heard the words Kai uttered.

"I do too," he shyly confesses, avoiding Kai's beaming eyes. "I like you a lot too. Like - a lot _a lot._ "

Kai purses his lips and looks down, mildly fumbling. "Hey, I'd love to take you out. Would it be okay?" He tries to say smoothly and brusquely but he's blushing and shaking too much to speak confidently. It's okay though because Beomgyu is covering his mouth to hide his amused smile as he nods.

"Of course." He answers. "I'd love to."

Kai bites his lowerlip, before letting out the biggest smile on his face as he snatches Beomgyu on his waist to pull him inside his room.

Beomgyu laughs when Kai puts him against the door the moment he closed it.

"Been trying to confess for ages," Kai whispers as he slowly leans closer to Beomgyu.

The older grins. "Yeah?"

Beomgyu thought Kai will kiss him again - he closes his eyes when Kai's lips land on his forehead instead.

"I think, I like how this turned out better."

-

( **Epilogue** :

"So, are you two dating already?" Soobin crosses his arms and Yeonjun snickers beside him.

Taehyun is just looking at them amusedly.

Kai bites his lips and rubs his nape as his other hand slowly intertwines with Beomgyu's, who was looking away - blushing.

"Wow. This is interesting." Hoseok snorts as he passes by. )

**Author's Note:**

> THIS IS SO WHOLESOME . 
> 
> this is almost like one of those 4 times plus 1 time fic except it was kai almost confessing quadruple times and that one time he finally snatched the guy of his dreams
> 
> ne ways. every kudos and comments will forever be appreciated! ilyall.
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/hueniverses)


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